The Polar Bear Plunge

Stockholm, Sweden 

December 9, 2011 

Sauna Temp = 190°F 

Water Temp = 37°F

So when we decided to go to Scandinavia in the winter, we were told that the thing to do is a traditional Swedish sauna, where you steam yourself like a dumpling and then either a.) jump in freezing water if it's available, or b.) roll in the snow. I was assured that people don't actually die doing it, which cheered me up a bit and made me feel adventurous and devil-may-care. So, we did it. And we survived.

The sauna is so hot and steamy that you are gasping for cool air. After I was cooked about medium rare (approximate internal temperature: one hundred thousand degrees), and my skin looked as red and glowing as the coals in the sauna, it was game time. Dunking yourself in the freezing cold Baltic Sea doesn't seem exactly appetizing, but it's as close as you'll get so you might as well get it over with.

You say a prayer and go outside. This part must be done very fast, because once you're outside the freezing air makes you lose your will to live, nanosecond by nanosecond. Your hair and eyebrows immediately frost over. You climb down the ladder as a concession to your heart, or if you're The Mister you just go for it and hope for the best. The water snaps at you with icy jaws and clamps down on your skin with a force that feels like tiny sharp teeth all over your body. Your mind has only one thought: &^%$#!!!!!!

I held my nose when I hopped in the water, scared that the temperature change would make me inhale in shock and get icy liquid in my lungs. I needn't have worried, however, because it turns out that water that cold makes you not breathe at all, and you'll notice that each of us is surprisingly quiet until we are out of the water, because each of us is experiencing lungs on total protest lockdown.

We had a pretty international group in our sauna: Scotland, Australia, Sweden, Germany and the USA all had representatives. Group bonding happens surprisingly quickly when you are half naked and sweating your buns off, and we laughed a lot and cheered each other on. I think it may be my favorite memory of Sweden.

*Warning: the video contains a little bit of beeped-out salty language, for obvious reasons. Look, if you had dunked Mother Theresa in that water she would have said more than darnit. Those words are for very special occasions and trust me, this was one of them. Sorry, Mom.